The Bowland Badass Rides Again!

Spring is in the air, and all you naughty Badasses have been out there putting the big miles and mankini shopping in preparation for your forthcoming role as the Buttertubs Bollockflasher during Le Grand Depart on the first weekend of July. But we’ve noticed a lingering sense of disappointment, even sadness, in the rain-laden air. No Bowland Badass this year…sniffle, sniffle. Why oh why?

The Prof sneaks off icognito

The Prof sneaks off icognito

After the glorious success of last year’s edition the Prof just said no. He simply refused point blank to organize another one. When asked to elucidate his  refusal he merely squawked in our faces like a rook on crack and disappeared back to his lair in Badass Mansions in a cloud of black dust.

It was no surprise this January when we checked the thrice-locked cellar door at his place and found it bust open. Peering into the gloomy darkness we saw the weighty lid of the Prof’s lead-lined sarcophagus lying cast aside. Of Mrs. Badass we found no trace, except for a clump of blonde hair in the hallway and some fingernail scratchmarks on the wall. It was clear. The Prof had migrated.

Imagine our surprise in early March when we chanced upon him soft pedalling down Garstang High Street with his wizened little face hairy as hell and brown as a pickled walnut, his twig like legs turning the cranks in slow motion.  

Somewhere far away

Somewhere far away

It turns out he’d buggered off to warmer climes over the winter and now he was back, and talking about doing the Bowland Badass one last time this summer.

YES! You heard it right. The Bowland Badass rides again!

So what happens now? The BB has changed. It’s become a run what you brung happening. There are no entry forms or fees, no signs, no feed stops, no insurance, no nothing. On 12th July a local posse (including the Prof), will set off from Bowland Badass Headquarters at 06:30 A.M. and trundle round the course, and anyone is welcome just to turn up and join us. All you’ll need is your bike, your Garmin with the route on it, a napsack full of goodies, a fresh set of legs and a devil may care attitude to extreme suffering….Simples!

Here is a link to the downloadable route:

The strava segment:



Posted on April 6, 2014, in News. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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